Shoulder pads and Reaganomics belong to the '80s. The O.J. Simpson trial and grunge rock helped define the '90s. So September 11 and cell phone texting will remind us of … what? The zeroes? Americans have had 10 whole years to figure out what to call the past decade, and yet most people are still at a loss when it comes to referring to it as anything other than "the current decade" or simply "the 21st century."
So far, two distinct strategies have emerged to cope with this apparent gap in the English language: evasion and creative license. VH1 is an example of the former, slyly sidestepping a decision on what to call the decade by focusing on the century instead. The network came up with "I Love the New Millennium" for the newest installment of its nostalgia-filled pop culture series, “I Love the '80s' and "I Love the '90s." And while the show’s title seems to be a bit of a cop-out, it certainly has a better ring to it than "I Love the '00s." Some publications like Slate have chosen to trundle forward with their use of “the aughts,” a term that was also used to refer to 1900 through 1909 and is synonymous with "zeroes." Others have tried giving it a cute spin, like The New York Times' Fashion & Style section, which calls it "the aughties." Ammon Shea, author of a book about reading the Oxford English Dictionary in one year, argues that use of "the aughts" is not something that has happened naturally. "It is more an idea that some people have of the way that the term should have been used,” he says.Moreover, the likelihood that "the aughts" will catch on in everyday conversation dwindles with each passing year. When asked what he thinks "the aughts" means, Alex Boenig, a 17-year-old from San Mateo, California, said, "A band." Nick Ochoa, also 17, from Redwood City, California, said, "A disease." Unless it’s suddenly picked up by younger generations — and unless younger Americans somehow discover what it actually means — "the aughts" are likely to remain a relic of the early 20th century.Leo Ribuffo, a history professor at George Washington University, doesn’t think the country’s collective indecisiveness on a word is cause for concern. "The lack of a catchphrase doesn’t mean that people don’t understand an era can be very, very important," he says. (Although he does think the decade has the potential to be considered "pretty bland" in the long run.) Ribuffo believes that one of the decade’s best chances for securing a label lies in a prominent figure or celebrity coming up with a term that catches on with the public, such as Tom Wolfe’s decision to anoint the 1970s "The Me Decade."Or it may come down to an average person being more decisive than most. The debate has been raging on Yahoo! Answers for years now, where users have come up with some creative solutions, like the O's, the 2K's, or "the onesies." Some users seem at least entertained by "the naughties," which an arts collective took up in a grassroots campaign in 1999 but ultimately failed to succeed on a colloquial level, though it’s used more often in the U.K. Whatever word or phrase, if any, finally ends up catching on with the public, it’s worth noting that the decision has given Americans pause. And as we hurtle into the teens with an insatiable media cycle that chews up and spits out fads at breakneck speed, it might be worth savoring this literal pause in the conversation about our culture and where it’s going. In the meantime, here’s to the "Ummm's" or "Uhhh's." Take your pick.

-- Leah Hitchings